The pitfalls of marrying an “older man” he really CAN’T see!

Don’t get me wrong- I knew what I was getting into when I met my then 39 year-old never been married husband, who was shall I say quite “set in his ways”. In other words, the carpet which appeared to be yellowed from stains and age and which covered the walls of his apartment (yes the carpet covered the walls of his apartment- not sure what the previous owner was thinking when she made that distinct design choice), didn’t seem to phase him.

I married Mr. Magoo photo courtesy of

Although he was a doctor- he refused to buy into the “hype” of a cell phone, and preferred the old-fashioned rotary style ones he had dotting his apartment. No my old man was very much stuck in the 80’s, and needed some major cajoling to get on board with the cordless phone wave of the 90’s.

But marrying someone 15 years older than me was not just a lesson in learning to compromise and understand the HUGE generational differences we possessed, ( growing up he saw Bewitched in its FIRST runs- growing up I saw it in reruns) but now that my husband is in his 50’s- physically there are some differences that as a 30-something – I realize I need to exercise more patience with.

Case in point last night, as every other night, my husband was brushing my son’s teeth. After wards, when my seven year came over to me to give me a nice toothpasty kiss and I noticed he had a VERY HARD NOT TO NOTICE brown spot on his tooth. I asked my husband what he thought it was. To which my husband said, “What are you talking about there is nothing there”. NOW ladies and gentlemen – there was DEFINITELY something there- but as is the case with my husband – he REALLY has a tough time seeing colors, spots, etc.. unless he is under special light, and what he’s looking at is angled in a particular way so that the light catches it and makes it simply sparkle…

I used to get really frustrated with my fifty-four year old man, (how could he not see what is so clearly perceptible by the naked eye!) but last night I had one of those light bulb moments…”Marrying someone who is 15 years older than you- you can’t get mad at him when he doesn’t see something because the truth is; his eyesight just isn’t that good.”

And so I am putting the question out there to the rest of you married or in a relationship- what’s been a light bulb moment for you about your relationship?


  1. says

    I'm married to my husband now for 2 years who is 13 years older then me. And I always joke about how old and elderly he is, but yell at him for not seeing an item clearly in front of him. I guess I forgot that his eyes probably don't work right anymore. LOL.

  2. says

    Another moment I thought of: my husband does not notice bumps, bruises, scratches on my daughter like I do. So I’m the one who dealt with (and noticed) diaper rash, excema, etc. If she has a boo-boo, I have to be the one to notice it; my hubby, who has a laser sharp focus on everything else, for some reason doesn’t focus on physical symptoms.

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