After 16 years of marriage- I get it– my husband and I are very different- or more precisely we have very different ways of demonstrating our love for one another. And yet you’d think I would have made my peace with this and somehow moved on…but I can’t.
I want the entire package, I want the fairytale. I want the guy who, when we’re sitting at a red light in the car, reaches over and takes my hand. I want a man who when I’m standing over the sink loading the dishwasher (I know great visual- eh?!) comes up from behind me and wraps his arms around my waist and envelops me in an embrace.
My husband is a good guy, and he definitely has his moments… but lately I’ve been more cognizant of his real inability to be demonstratively intimate with me and I hate feeling as though this is as good as it gets.
But maybe it is, maybe as a woman I can’t expect my husband to be as openly affectionate with me as I am with him. I know we were raised with diametrically opposing attitudes in regards to love and expressing it. He’s even admitted that the phrase ‘ love you’ was used very sparingly during his childhood and was only unleashed at exceptional occasions, whereas I’ve always said I love you to my family at every conceivable moment I could fit it in.
I get it, we’re different, so does that mean I shouldn’t ask for more and take his actions as a validation of the love he feels for me? Maybe I’m just like that annoying Julia Roberts character in that bubblegum fairytale Pretty Woman… who wants the whole fairytale. Am I?